Speaker: Gary Peters

Passage: Matthew 1

A GLIMPSE INTO JOSEPH – MATTHEW 1

I’ve got a million things running through my mind right now, where the Lord wants to take us. So if I go off script, there may not be any notes, any Scripture on the screen, but that’s okay. Turn to Matthew 1, please. 

Father, as we begin to study Your Scripture, I pray for Your anointing, Your covering. God, we need You. Father, I am so cognizant of the fact that people have come to hear from You. God, You know the needs in the room, You know exactly what every one of us are longing for. We ask that You would come, Holy Spirit. You’re the guide, You’re the teacher, You’re the One that leads us into truth, that You would come and minister like only You can. We thank You for Your faithfulness to us. Break the bread of life, the Word of God to us. We thank You in Jesus’ name, amen. 

MATTHEW 1

“This is the record of the ancestors of Jesus the Messiah, the descendant of David and of Abraham: Abraham was the father of Isaac–” I’ve been studying Abraham, but I can’t go there right now– “Isaac was the father of Jacob. Jacob was the father of Judah and his brothers. Judah was the father of Perez and Zerah (whose mother was Tamar). Perez was the father of Hezron. Hezron was the father of Ram.” Ram was the father of those dudes, and those dudes were the father of Boaz. When I’m reading genealogy, if you read the first six chapters of 1 Chronicles, it’s just kind of like, Okay already. But when you understand Scripture, you realize all of that is important. But that’s not where I want to go today. 

“Was the father of Boaz, (whose mother was Rahab). Boaz was the father of Obed (whose mother was Ruth). Obed was the father of Jesse. Jesse was the father of King David. King David was the father of Solomon (whose mother was Bathsheba, the widow of Uriah).” Verse 16, “Jacob was the father of Joseph, the husband of Mary. Mary gave birth to Jesus, who is called the Messiah. All those listed above were fourteen generations from Abraham to David, fourteen generations from David to the Babylonian captivity, and fourteen generations from the Babylonian exile to the Messiah.” 

When you understand the genealogy of Jesus, it looks a lot like the world we live in: wicked political leaders, the will of man; there’s death, deceit, prostitution, adultery, murder, and exile. Be encouraged because it also looks like the Gospel: God’s faithfulness, God’s sovereignty, God’s life, God’s calling, God’s forgiveness, God’s redemption, and God’s blessed hope. 

THE LIFE OF JOSEPH

Today, I want to glimpse into the life of Joseph, Mary’s husband and earthly father of Jesus. Very quickly, some historical background: some research says he is a decade or years older than Mary. Earlier texts say he was closer to Mary’s age. I don’t think it’s important. The importance was he had to be somebody that God chose to raise His beloved Son. Incredible man. 

He had other children with Mary; two of them were writers of the New Testament, James and Jude. The Scriptures state that Jesus had brothers, so therefore he fathered children. He most likely died before Jesus began His earthly ministry, sometime during the eighteen silent years. There’s no record of him after this. 

JEWISH BETROTHAL 

Look at verse 18: “This is how Jesus the Messiah was born. His mother, Mary, was betrothed or engaged to be married to Joseph. But before the marriage could take place, while she was still a virgin, she became pregnant through the power of the Holy Spirit.” 

As I’m studying this, we think about how somebody gets pregnant. God made Adam out of mud. He made Eve out of a rib. Don’t you think He could impregnate Mary by just saying this egg is going to be fertilized? There’s nothing sexual about it. It has the idea that God created life in her. 

And we got to understand that during this time, they were betrothed or engaged. Betrothal amongst the Jews must not be confused with the present-day engagement; it was far more serious and binding. The bridegroom and the bride pledged their loyalty to each other in the presence of witnesses. In a restricted sense, this was essentially the marriage, just hasn’t been consummated yet. It is clear from the fact that Joseph is called Mary’s husband in verse 19, and Mary is called Joseph’s wife in verse 20, which we’re going to read in just a minute. And according to Old Testament regulations, unfaithfulness in a betrothed woman was punishable by death. 

Verse 19, “Joseph, her fiance, her husband, was a good, righteous, just man and he did not want to disgrace her publicly, so he decided to break off the engagement quietly. As he considered this, the angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream. ‘Joseph, son of David,’ the angel said, ‘do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife. For the child within her was conceived by the Holy Spirit. And she will have a son, and you are to name him Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.’ 

“All of this occurred to fulfill the Lord’s message through his prophet: ‘Look! The virgin will conceive a child! She will give birth to a son, and they will call him Emmanuel, which means ‘God with us.’’ When Joseph awoke, he did as the angel commanded and took Mary as his wife. But he did not have sexual relations with her until the son was born. And Joseph named him Jesus.” 

JOSEPH’S BETRAYAL

It amazes me in this passage that God equates a righteous person with one that is willing to walk in forgiveness. In the manner that we are forgiven, Jesus says in the sermon on Mount, we will be forgiven. In the manner that we forgive others, we will be forgiven ourselves. Ponder that for a moment. Joseph is facing the fact that the love of his life has cheated on him. 

We already talked about the Jewish culture of the day. They lived in a small town. I grew up in one. Everybody knew everybody in my family. I was called Little Pete because my grandpa was Pete, my dad was Pete, my brother was Pete, and I was a Little Pete. So everybody called me Pete. Nobody knew me as Gary. The whispers of a small town, the snarky looks of a small town, yet we see the character and integrity to as secretly as possible break off the marriage. 

This morning, when I woke up, I realized I needed to really study betrayal, and so I’m crash-coursing on what betrayal means. And it literally means to expose the weakness, failures, or sin of another. He felt betrayed, but guess what he did? He didn’t betray in kind. 

What is human nature, church? Human nature– every one of us in this room– when we feel hurt or betrayed, we instantly go to cover ourselves and expose the person that did this to us. And in the Gospel, the exact opposite is true. 

Jesus was publicly exposed. He was crucified outside the gate of Jerusalem. He was completely naked, or as my father-in-law from Oklahoma used to say, buck naked. He was naked and exposed. How many of you would love that? Yeah, awesome. Because He has taken our betrayal. 

Betrayal is not unique to Joseph; it is the heart of the Gospel. While Jesus is on the cross, Father, forgive them because they’ve lost their minds. They don’t know what they’re doing. And that is especially hard for us when we see the insight through the Spirit of God, and we know what the problem is, and yet we can say, Father, forgive them; they don’t know what they’re doing. 

Have any of you in here had somebody do something to you where you know the motive behind it, but they literally are blind to that? Isn’t it fun to walk in that? Isn’t it awesome? It amazes me many times that we think, Well, that’s for somebody else, but betrayal is not unique to Joseph. 

FORGIVING BETRAYAL IS DIFFICULT

God understands, I believe, the pain and the heartache of betrayal, and especially when someone has committed sexual sin in a marriage relationship. My personal opinion is this: one of the reasons why Jesus gave the exception clause to us– You shall not divorce someone, except for adultery, for fornication, for sexual sin– because it’s so hard for us to grasp the understanding that we can forgive. 

And I’m not saying it’s easy. I’m just saying there’s grace available. And what amazes me is when there’s grace available, there normally comes grace on the one that has been offended for that season, and yet, through a lifetime of process, they have to walk out that offense. Follow me? It is extremely difficult to release forgiveness and then spend a lifetime of refusing to pick that offense back up. 

That’s why He gave us the exception clause. And I have told married couples when one partner has walked in adultery, that there may be grace on you to forgive now, but you’re going to have to spend a lifetime walking out that offense and releasing that back to God, because the enemy is very faithful to remind us of what somebody has done to us, to hurt us. 

You know why God put such restrictions on sexual behavior? Because it’s the only thing we can create that will last forever. We have the power to create life. There’s only been one Immaculate Conception; His name was Jesus. It takes the deed to produce the child. 

JESUS DEALT WITH BETRAYAL

And when we choose to forgive, we look like Jesus. You want the community you live in, you want your family to see Christ in you? Choose to walk in forgiveness. And the deeper the wound, the more the cleansing is necessary; the deeper the hurt, the more the forgiveness is necessary. 

The fifth statement of Jesus on the cross was, “I thirst.” They took a sponge, dipped it in vinegar and gall, or bitterness, a bitter plant, but it was like an opiate. Be like taking some opiate. They dipped it in the solution, took the sponge, put it on a spear, and held it up to His mouth, and He refused it. 

It’s so interesting that He was conceived in a time where people thought he had been betrayed. Before He goes to the cross, it says, on the night that He was what? Betrayed, He took bread and broke it. That’s why we’re saving bread and cup until the end.

WE MUST REFUSE THE COMFORT OF BITTERNESS

There were seven statements on the cross. The fifth one was, “I thirst,” the choice of refusing the bitter gall that He took. Because, see, bitterness has a way in our hearts, church, of being an opiate to us. Some people can’t forgive because they love the comfort of bitterness. Isn’t that weird? It’s so weird to me. But yet, I’ve seen it in my own heart. There’s a comforting effect to it, sometimes. 

And when you walked in it, or generations have walked it in your family, it’s so hard to not walk in it because it’s comforted grandma, it’s comforted mom, it’s comforted dad, it’s comforted Uncle Bill, Aunt Susie, whoever. Everybody in the family has been comforted by bitterness. And yet you, as a Christian, God says, It’s enough, draw a line in the sand and say no more, it’s not going to go on. 

And let me say this, if you’ve been hurt deeply, and God is asking you to walk in forgiveness, it is the closest example of Jesus that the world will ever see. I’m not saying it’s easy. On the night that He knew He was going to be betrayed– and He was betrayed– He took bread and broke it. Then on the cross, the last statement before He says “it’s done” is He was challenged to embrace bitterness. 

He was challenged to embrace hurt, the very opposite of what He was supposed to do on the cross. I just find it so interesting. Then He says, when He passed that test, guess what? It’s done. It’s over. It’s finished. Then He said, It’s finished, and then He said, Into your hands, I commit my spirit and breathed His last. 

There’s no accident in the order that those things took place because we will be challenged until the day we die, to pick up the offense of people that have hurt us. Everybody, look at me. Be encouraged. You’re going to be pooped on. You’re going to be hurt. I was going to say something else. Not the real bad word. 

JOSEPH’S EXAMPLE OF FORGIVENESS

How does someone walk out this righteousness and refuse the comfort of bitterness? The first thing is we do what Joseph did. The Word is so amazing to me, it says, “as he considered this.” Because what’s the enemy say? React, get back, share a word for their word, stab for their stab, hurt for their hurt. 

Joseph was a righteous man. As it says, he considered putting her away privately. See, betrayal is to expose; he wasn’t willing to expose her. He had every right to expose her. Do we realize that Joseph’s perspective of I’ve been cheated on, was, though logical, not correct? 

When we’ve been hurt, we can logically say, This is the result, and this is what I’m going to do. 

We can put in all the logic, but because we can logically think something through, doesn’t mean it’s truth. 

Has anybody in this room ever been lied to by their own emotions, by their own hurt, by their own pain? Of course, we have. But he chose to walk in forgiveness “as he considered this.” My logical, correct solutions or thoughts are not necessarily God’s final word. 

“He did not want to disgrace her publicly, so he decided to break the engagement quietly. As he considered this, the word of the Lord came to him.” Do me a favor. Please promise me, before you respond in kind, step back and say, God, what’s Your word in this situation? What are You saying to me in this situation? What are You asking of me? 

“But when he thought this over,” another translation says. One commentator says he was inspired to ponder. I love that. Be inspired to take a step back, please. Don’t perpetuate the problem in your family. 

Every one of you that are listening to me this morning, we have the privilege of saying, No more in my family, no more in my church, no more in my city. I am drawing a line in the sand, and it’s stopping now because I am choosing to walk where God’s asked me to walk. That will affect the world, that will change your family, that will do something unlike anything else because it’s the closest example to what Jesus has done. 

SEEK GOD’S PERSPECTIVE

And this word, ponder or consider, means to think about carefully, especially in order to make a rational decision; contemplative reflection upon. Step back, let the emotions settle, and give 

time for God’s perspective, His voice. 

My wife and I, for forty-five years, have tried to– I wish we could say we do it all the time– but step back, be honest. Like right now, I’m ticked, that hurt my feelings. This is how I interpreted what you just did, and I’m mad. So I’m going to step back. I’m going to go to my corner of the ring, and I’m going to get my heart right with God before I respond in kind. It’ll change your marriage, responding versus reacting. 

And then it’s important that once he heard what God said, what did he do? He woke up and did it. I love throughout the Scripture, the word of the Lord came to Elijah, and Elijah did it, so he went. God says, Go, and so he went. Every place you see somebody walking with God, God speaks; they do. God speaks; they do. 

YIELD YOUR RIGHTS

The second thing we’ve got to do is yield our rights. The Lord spoke this to me a couple weeks ago because I knew I was going to share on this for the last couple months. Been pondering it and pondering it. And God says, Gary, just because you can doesn’t mean you should. Okay. Just because you can doesn’t mean you should. Pastor Greg always says, just because you have an opinion doesn’t mean you should share it. 

How many like to be around people that always share their opinion? I want to tell you, every time somebody says something to me, I have something to say. That’s just my nature. But I’ve got to be able to step back and say, Maybe not. 

Philippians, 2:4-11, which is where all the cults miss Who Jesus is. They say, How could God be God and pray to God when He’s God? Because He emptied Himself. “Do not look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too. You must listen. You must have the same attitude that Christ had. Though he was God, he did not think equality with God was something to cling to. Instead, he gave up his divine privileges; he took the humble position of a slave and was born as a human being. 

“When he appeared in human form, he humbled himself in obedience to God and died a criminal’s death on the cross. Therefore, God elevated him–” or exalted him– “to the place of highest honor and gave him the name above all other names, that at the name of Jesus every knee will bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue will declare that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.” 

I had a right to respond one time, and I was struggling. I had people encouraging me to respond. We’re studying the life of David with the men. You always will have people that say, Can I lift that dead dog’s head off his shoulders for you, David? Abishai, when Shimei curses David, he says, David, you don’t even have to do it. I’ll do it for you. Let me lift that dead dog’s head off his shoulders for you. In other words, let me chop his head off. 

I had other people saying, Gary, you won’t do it. Let me do it for you. Let me stand for you. Let me tell him. Let me give him a piece of your mind. It amazes me how many guys are wusses, and their wife is their mouthpiece for them because they don’t have a backbone to stand. But that’s another sermon. 

1 Corinthians 6:7, he’s talking about lawsuits in the church, and he says, “Actually, then, it is already a defeat for you, that you have a lawsuit with one another. Why not rather suffer the wrong? Why not rather be defrauded?” Does anybody kind of just go, Oh. Maybe you don’t. Paul is saying, Maybe God’s asking you to lay it down. Maybe embracing the rejection is understanding My heart for humanity. 

WE ARE TO HUMBLE OURSELVES AS JESUS DID

The principle of humbling ourselves and being exalted, Jesus took upon himself the servant attitude. He says, I could be equal, I am equal with God, but I am not going to hold on to it. I’m not going to cling to it. I’m not going to grasp it. I’m going to release My divinity, and I’m going to take on humanity so that I can save humanity. And when He did that, it says God exalted Him and gave Him a name above every other name. That’s why, when you stub your toe, Buddha doesn’t come to mind. 

When we humble ourselves, James says this in chapter 4, verse 10, “Humble yourselves in the presence of the Lord, and He will exalt you.” When we humble ourselves and yield our rights to God, He will exalt us. And it’s not like He’ll show everybody how cool you are, He’ll raise you above the problem that you’re dealing with. That’s the idea of exaltation. It’s that, Yeah, one day, we’re going to be exalted and be like Him. 

But the fact is when we humble ourselves and say, God, I want to punch them in the face. God, I want to deal with them. God, I want to take my own vengeance. God, I want to get even. God, I want to respond in kind. And we say, but I yield those rights to You, all of a sudden, you are above, and you have a different perspective of the problem, and therefore you can say, Father, forgive them because they’ve lost their minds. How many want to be exalted above some problems? That’s why I said, don’t you realize you’re seated in Heavenly places? 

DON’T FORFEIT GOD’S GRACE

Years ago, reading the Book of Jonah, the NIV says, “Those that cling to worthless idols forfeit the grace of God that could be theirs.” You know when he realized that? When he’s in the belly of the big fish, the whale, whatever it was– big enough to eat him. I’ve had parents say, Do whatever it takes for my child to get right with God, do whatever it takes. So God sends a fish, and you’re like, No, no, no, God. I didn’t mean that. But in the belly of the whale, he says, I realize when I cling to my worthless idols, I forfeit the grace. 

And James says that when we humble ourselves, He gives us what? Grace. Peter says the same thing. He gives us grace. Grace is not only unmerited favor, grace is the power and the desire to do the will of God. And when we humble ourselves, He pours grace. But when we cling to our idols, we forfeit the grace. It’s not that it’s not there, we forfeit it.

It says that Herodias– you know why she killed John the Baptist? Because John the Baptist said, You’re married to your brother-in-law. You caused a divorce. You’re committing adultery. It’s wrong. And from that moment on, it says Herodias nursed a grudge towards John the Baptist. And I just picture her holding that close to her chest, giving it nourishment for years, until she finally said, Now I’ll take his head, and we’ve got to be careful. 

FOLLOW JOSEPH’S EXAMPLE WHEN WE EXPERIENCE SUFFERING

In closing, the Christmas Story reminds us that, number one, none of us are exempt from suffering deep hurt and rejection. It’s not if, it’s when. And let me encourage you, when you pass one test, there’ll be another one waiting for you down the road. 

Remember what Pastor Dustin said? What we’re studying in Revelation? What’s the voice coming out of the bottomless pit? Bitterness. It’s the very nature of Hell. Walking in unforgiveness and bitterness is the very nature of Hell. So none of us are exempt. 

So when we do suffer hurt, we must stop, ponder, consider, get God’s perspective, hear His voice, and obey what He’s saying, humble ourselves, yield our rights, and quickly– in obedience– trust God with the consequences. Say, God, it’s Yours. God, it’s Yours. 

“On the night that Jesus was betrayed, He took bread and broke it and said, ‘This is my body which is for you.'” He’s forgiven us, church, and He’s given us the privilege of walking in forgiveness towards others. You know what encourages me about this? Probably Monday morning, somebody’s going to test you on it. 

And my prayer is, Well, remember Joseph, he was a righteous man, and his righteousness was exemplified by him releasing forgiveness. We want to expose somebody else’s sin, but we want our sin what? Covered? It doesn’t work that way. 

So I’m gonna invite you, at the end of bread and cup, at the end of announcements, we’re gonna have prayer teams. God doesn’t share a message like this unless we need to make business with God. I’ve been struggling with this for the last, like I said, couple months, six weeks, because I knew what I was going to share. And guess what? I’ve been tested to release. “On the night that He was betrayed, he took bread, said, ‘It’s for you. Do this in remembrance.'” Let’s remember what He’s done for us, and let’s release it to others. Amen. Let’s have bread and cup together.